Comic Redub #2

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Comic Redub

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For the original story accompanying this art, check out Breaking Into Comics the Marvel Way #1. (Art by Paul Davidson, Story by Chris Yost)

Socks

I had a little panic attack today. Why, you might ask. (You might ask. I'm not sure why, but you might.)

Well, whether you ask or not, I'll tell you. I bought socks.

I could bore you with the story of how I have spent these last cold weeks in southern PA slowly discovering that my old socks had holes in them by stepping on cold tile whilst slipping down to the kitchen for a late night snack, or I could just jump to the short version -- I needed new socks.

So, after much him-hawing (because I see any money spent on clothing as "vanity money" that could be used instead for a new toy), I gave in and bought new socks.

In fact, I bought 6 pairs of new socks. Nothing fancy. Not my style.

But, after the buying, came the laundering. Not the money style. The actual water-and-soap style.

Let me skip ahead one washer and dryer load, to the action!

After all was said and done, I had 6 new pairs of socks. Soft. Tight elastic. Thick soles. Perfect.

And, in order to keep my life and sock drawer perfectly neat, I decided to rid myself of 6 old, hole-ridden, loose-elastic socks.

It wasn't hard. "There's a hole. Pitch in the garbage."

But, I got to thinking. I hadn't bought new socks in about 5 years. That's 5 years worth of service these socks gave to me.

And, then I got to even more thinking. Those socks were brand-new in 2005. I was 19 in 2005.
I was a freshman in college in 2005.

Those socks, now sitting quietly in my trash, had been through quite a lot with me.

They were there when I moved to college. They were there in those horrifying, exhilarating days.

I was wearing those socks before I even knew what I was "going to be when I grew up." (That, of course, assumes that I know now.) These socks sat in my underwear drawer as I was discovering who I was.

At the age of 19, I thought I wanted to be a computer programmer. Then, a high school English teacher. Then, some kind of psychologist.

Now, of course, I want to be a writer. I mean, a paid writer. But, at 19, I didn't know that. I only knew I had the writer's spirit, but, like Bruce Banner, I was unsure of how to wield my inner-strength. At that time, writing was a hobby. Not an opportunity.

I hadn't made the decision to take a Creative Writing course. I hadn't met influential professors. I hadn't even thought of a graduate degree. Of flying to frigid Vermont to meet with other writers and hone my craft.

I hadn't had the thought yet, What if I'm not good enough? What if I'm crap and no one will tell me the truth? What if I'm a joke?

None of that had come yet.

At the age of 19, I was dating the same girl I am dating today. But, at the time, I was fumbling with my first relationship. Now, I'm still fumbling, but now I'm an experienced fumbler.

All of these things occurred since I bought those socks. But I didn't pull them out of the trash. That would be an inability to let go of the past.

But then I saw these new socks. 6 new pairs. Purchased in 2009.

And I thought to myself, what will life be like when I throw these socks away?

Let's say I finally come around to buying new socks for myself 5 years from now. What will have happened? What will these new socks have seen?

Where will I be? Will I be somewhere for work?

Will I be writing? Teaching? Selling poorly hand-crafted straw dolls on Venice Beach to buy gas for my van?

Will I be married? A father? Or will I have made "The Ultimate Fumble?"

It's the strangest wish I've ever made, but I wished then and there that these socks could talk to me from that future. What advice would they give me? What forecasts of doom or happiness?

All of these thoughts of the past and future from such innocent-looking garments. How naive I was when I bought them. How naive.

I've Been Touching My iPod. A Lot.

Even though the disc for Batman: Arkham Asylum is sitting in the tray of my Xbox 360, my most amusing toy as of late has been my iPod Touch. My little Hitchhiker's Guide is little more than a year old now, and I have to say that using it as a $300 remote control never gets old.

But, aside from that, here's what I've got on the Touch...

1. Podcasts

In my first post, I mentioned a list of podcasts I've been listening to, as I've become a talk-radio junkie. I'm sad to report that Maniacal Rage has not recorded a new podcast since March, but it still plays constantly on my iPod. In order to cope with my podcast fix, I've found some new ones:

Wordballoon with John Siuntres. It's a comic book podcast that focuses on specific creators in a one-on-one interview. While every interview may not be a top-tier creator, host John Siuntres is a personality of epic proportions in the comic book podcasting world. He's like your fun uncle who thinks nothing has ever topped The Dick Van Dyke Show.

The real highlight of his show has always been the Bendis Tapes episodes, in which Siuntres interviews the one and only Brian M. Bendis, superstar of Marvel Comics. The Bendis Tapes began about four years ago, and Siuntres interviews Bendis every six months or so. Currently, Siuntres is releasing a new set of these Tapes, and anyone interested in comics, film, pop culture, or listening to two incredibly well-read individuals, this is the nectar of the gods.

Co-Op. It's a well-done yet relaxed video podcast shot in San Francisco about the latest video games. What makes this podcast unique is that it isn't shot on a soundstage. It has guerrilla segments shot on the streets of San Fran, featuring the Co-Op hosts and a varied array of guests talk about games. The comments can range from the casual to the hard-core, and after watching these episodes, I always want to go out and play these games.

Also, Co-Op is updated pretty regularly (about once a week), so there's never a long wait for the next one.

Finally, That's What She Said. TWSS is a fan-produced Office podcast. Each episode comments on the most recent NBC's The Office episode. The hosts talk about what worked and what didn't work, with segments of the show's audio thrown in as well. I sometimes find the hosts bashing on the show more often than enjoying it, but for the most part it's a nice (and free) audio companion to the TV show.

2. Motion Comics

I blogged about motion comics back in August, and I mentioned Spider-Woman: Agent of SWORD. At the time, I was brimming with anticipation as the previously mentioned Brian Bendis was writing the first Marvel Motion Comic that wasn't an adaptation of an early print comic.

As of today, there are 4 episodes of Spider-Woman available for download on iTunes, and I may not be as enthusiastic as I previously was. Motion comics have a way to go, as the illustrated audio book just doesn't seem to be original enough to last beyond the novelty. Yet, Spider-Woman is gorgeous. Artist Alex Maleev has clearly poured his heart into the art for this book, and Bendis has been waiting to write this book for about 10 years.

All 4 eps are on my iPod now, and I've watched them several times. I even wrote a review about Episodes 1 and 4 for ComicNews.info. Again, comic nerds, check this out.

3. Games

I had originally believed games for the iPhone/iPod Touch to be cheap and crappy. Up until about one month ago, the only game I had was a free app version of Solitaire, which only got some playtime during a long wait at the Charlotte airport.

However, my eyes have been opened.

Harbor Master is puzzle game that utilizes the touch feature of the iPhone. You guide little ships into their docks, let them unload their cargo, and then you lead them out. Sounds simple, I know, but wait until you get four ships at once -- two of them 4-cargo ships -- and then try to lead them all around without crashing one into the other. It's not easy. Trust me.


I probably wouldn't have given this game an initial glance were it not for the 99-cent price tag. Seriously cheap. Seriously awesome.

And the soundtrack is quite enjoyable. It's a simply little beat to accompany your harbor-mastering, but the sounds you make when moving your ships around actually becomes part of the music.

Also, I recently got geoDefense Swarm. Now, I'm a tower defense junkie, so this is the game for me. There's another GD game, simply titled geoDefense, but Swarm is different in that you are given an open field (for the most part) on which you can place your turrets. Anyone who has played Tower Defense games will know how this works.


What makes this game special is the stunning graphics and color. Everything is vibrant on the crisp iPhone screen. Again, another 99-cent game. (The original geoDefense is $1.99.) Both are must-haves for the iPhone.

For now, that's all I've got, and it's keeping me busy. However, other downloads loom on the horizon.

Till next time.

Your Guide to...DVD Commentary

Now, I've talked a lot of movie talk in my time. I've also done a lot of the TV chatter. I'm a media junkie, so that can't be helped.

I know people who go out and buy new DVDs every Tuesday. Whether they've seen them or not, they buy them. Brand new.

And the next week, these people want nothing more than to tell me about the latest DVD purchases. They want to tell me about the deleted scenes, alt endings, additional disc of 18 unseen hours of whatever.

But whenever I mention commentary, everyone clams up.

At first, I never understood this. People will watch lots of extra stuff on DVDs, otherwise why would it be there? It helps sell the product.

People will watch a lot of stuff, but no one ever listens to commentary. Except for the real nerds.

Only the real nerds want someone else to tell them about the movie, rather than just watching the movie themselves. Please, William Shatner, tell me about Wrath of Khan.

But, I'm being honest here. I'm that kind of nerd. I watch the commentary, because I want to see these things through the creators' eyes. I want to know what Steve Carell is like off-camera.

Nay, I need to know.

I'm going to assume that, if you're reading this, you're not a part of that .001% that enjoys the commentary, so, for your ease, I'm going to explain the commentary so that you might know when it's worth your time.

You need to know who will be in the commentary. I don't just mean, make sure whoever is talking is someone important. I've listened to commentary with lead actors or directors, and they can be boring.

I mean, know what kind of personalities you're going to be listening to. It's like talk radio. If you don't like who's talking, you're not going to want to hear what they're talking about.

I'm a big fan of The Office, and most of the episode commentaries are great because Jenna Fischer or Rainn Wilson are in 99% of the commentary tracks. They're the kind of commentators who keep the energy level high, know when to shut up and when to talk, and, most importantly, they know what's interesting and what is not.

I've noticed that, when the mics are rolling and it's commentary time, there are three types of people.

First, there's the person who acts of MC for the commentary, like Rainn or Jenna as I mentioned eariler. They ask the questions of the other people. They organize the whole show.

Second, there's the person who has something interesting to say. They're the director or casting consultant or writer. However, they won't be the loudest voice. In fact, these people are often intimidated by the third type of commentator...

The loudmouth. The loudmouth doesn't have anything of actual interest to say. Normally, they give insightful comments like "I like this part" or "That was funny." Often, they will simply narrate what is going on. "This is where Frodo drops the ring. Let's watch!" They add nothing of interest, but they're in the commentary because they're someone of importance to the work.

While film commentary will often have the bigger named stars, I'm more often drawn to listening to TV commentary. This is basically because I've come to learn that, if one season of a show has good commentary, the entire series will have good commentary. The Office continues to have good insight. One episode of Season 5 had BJ Novak and the catering crew, and I still found it excellent.

Family Guy has commentary on almost every episode, with Seth MacFarlane in every track.

While 30 Rock's commentary is mostly Tina Fey and her husband, who does music for the show, the commentary is as stunningly brilliant as the show. Occasionally you'll get Alec in there, but mostly it's quiet Tina. But that's fine with me.

Sadly, not all commentary is amazing. Commentary will almost always be interesting to the diehard fan, but to outsiders, it can be a waste.

Avoid commentary with less than three people. It gets slow or dull. Also, avoid commentary with a whole party of people. It's usually hard to tell what's being said, and it sounds like the commentators are just having a keg party back there.

How I Met Your Mother's commentary mainly consists of the show's creators, Carter Bays and Craig Thomas, pimping their band and narrating the show. While I'm a huge fan of this show, I don't really have a stomach for the commentary.

Others, while not outstanding, are definitely worth the listen. Tropic Thunder features Robert Downey Jr. doing his character voice throughout the entire film.

Yes, it's for the nerdiest of the nerds, but it's awesome. At least, I think so.

Writing Exercise: "The Five Dollar Bill"

Again, another exercise I cannot take credit for. I found this one on C.M. Mayo's website of 5 Minute Writing Exercises.

"The Five Dollar Bill"
A five dollar bill changes hands five times in one day. Make a list of where, when, who hands it over, and for what. For example:
~Where: Starbucks, New Jersey Turnpike
~When: 7:30 am;
~Who: Bob, a truck driver;
~What: a cup of coffee (black) and a bean burrito.
If you can complete this exercise in less than five minutes, go back and add more detail to describe the places and the people.


Where: Movie Theater, Manhattan
When: 10:00 p.m.
Who: Chris Rogers
What: 2 tickets to the newest chick flick

Where: 7-11, Queens
When: 12:13 a.m.
Who: Hank Greer (who pocketed the $5)
What: Diapers

Where: First National Bank, Midtown
When: 9:10 a.m.
Who: Mario Oliveri
What: Deposit of Yesterday's Cash

Where: Back Alley, Bronx
When: 7:03 p.m.
Who: Jenna Hiteman (who robbed the bank)
What: "8 Ball"

Where: Joe's Floral
When: 8:30 p.m.
Who: Chris Rogers
What: Dozen red roses

(Note: I took the guideline of "changes hands 5 times in one day" to equal 24 hours. Also, my five dollar bill is most times part of a larger transaction. For example, clearly the deposit at the bank is not just $5.)

This is one I really had fun with when it was all over. I had a little difficulty finishing within the 5 minutes, as I really thought about plot as I made the dollar change hands. Once finished, I was kind of amazed how the plot twisted and actually had a meaning behind it, although somewhat shallow.

The Disney/Marvel Team-up!

Undoubtedly, you have all heard of Disney's buyout of Marvel Entertainment for the low, low, bargain bin price of a mere 4 billion cool ones, but I thought I'd take the time and address this matter from the point of view of a fan who is not (yet) a fanboy.

(The key difference between "fan" and "fanboy" is in the intensity with which one approaches the material. For instance, when I read Wolverine, I always give a Joe Cool thumbs-up whenever Logan pops his claws, inevitably causing a SNIKT sound effect. This is the sign of a fan.

A fanboy, however, reads Wolverine while wearing a Wolverine costume - at least the mask and hairdo - and yells profanity anytime SNIKT is not drawn in exactly the same style as his first in costume appearance in GIANT-SIZE X-MEN #1. A fanboy also follows up this lovely reading experience by going onto the interwebs of doom, finding a comic book message board, and creating a thread called "WOLVERINE IS SO TEH LAME NOW, I HATE HIM FOR MAKING ME WASTE MY ALLOWANCE!!!1!!")

Disney buying Marvel, in my opinion, is nothing short of a good opportunity. For one, we can now get a Beast/Beast crossover.

Really, though, if you check message boards and poll the opinions of comic book fans, they will tell you this is the apocalypse. Trees are dying, the oceans are drying up, and Mickey is responsible.

Most people in the biz will tell you this is actually a good thing. More outlets for Marvel characters to be seen - more TV shows, more movies, more video games. I don't really see how this is negative. I doubt Disney will decide that "Disneyfy" (the newest buzz word to come out of this whole deal) and make things more kid-friendly than necessary.

But, in the end, why should I, the consumer, be concerned?

Namely, a Silver Surfer/Buzz Lightyear mini-series!


I kid, I kid.

It's an honest reaction to worry about a hobby some of us have enjoyed every Wednesday since we were 7. I get that. Comics have defined our lives. You don't want to see Spider-Man suddenly become 10 years old and fight mean old Dr. Octy-puss. But I don't think we have to worry about that. Really I don't.

The prime example being used lately is Pixar, owned by Disney since 2006. They've been doing just fine, as Disney pretty much let them keep doing what they've been doing. Now, the flip side is that Pixar was doing kid-friendly stuff at the time, and Marvel is currently focused more on an adult market.

Should we worry? I would say no. Disney won't do anything drastic. Marvel has clearly defined its market, and I don't think Disney is looking to change it. Expand it, maybe. But not change.

But, only time will tell, I guess.

Oh, one more!

Snow White and Emma Frost: Disney Divas!


OK, I'm done. I think.